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MID-FIELD DIAGNOSIS

One weekend this past summer I was in Wawayanda NY at the sod farm where heaven happens. Um, I mean, where I fly my rubber-powered tissue-covered model planes with similarly interested brethren. It was a gorgeous day, many lovely flights floating lazily overhead in the gentlest of zephyrs   more»

one note

When one note will do. When a single line needs no shading. When the speech is shortand solo well-placed words know the audience is there. When the page goes unfilled risking wasted paper. As the wind-up is shortened and the follow-through everything. As   more»

PETIE AND THE PUMP

Here’s a pic snapped out of the bedroom window of what we call in this house “Petie”, aka a cardinal aka “bird feeder bullies”. My Aunt T, Alice, was my mother’s 2nd oldest sister. I don’t know a ton about her. She lived through a 500 yard   more»

WHAT I RUN TO

I run. Not far, not fast, not pretty. But I run. I ran Boston in ’82. Unofficially, but I finished in 4 hours and 15 minutes. That’s an average 9min 45 sec per mile. Today I run about 3 to 5 miles. Now   more»

WHEN A GREATER NUMBER OF FOLKS THAN YOU EVER THOUGHT...OH WHATEVER...

Running 5 miles the other day (25 lbs down, thanks) in these really cool support socks (did I just write that? ) I was listening to Stevie Wonder’s "Love’s In Need Of Love Today” and in the unbelievably musical outro he says to the band: “Bring it down a little‘Cause   more»

TWO THIRDS BROKEN HEART

You asked, so this is another aviation post. However, it’s been a rough week. Tom is the most incredible rubber-powered model plane builder I’ve ever known. Seemingly perpetual Flying Aces Club Grand Champion. Brilliant artists both, he and his wife together are responsible for all of   more»

SPEAKING OF AIRPLANES…

Humor me and the airplane posts. It’s my birthday. No argument in the world about how my skin is saved because of the great men who fought for my right to have this opinion, etc. etc. will move me to build an active model warplane.   more»

THINGS

~ Last night I sliced and lightly fried cucumbers. Yes I did. Lightly battered. Light oil. Batter was gluten free flour, one egg, salt, garlic powder. All that was missing was the little triangle pieces of bread, little floral plates, and some old southern white   more»

FILOSOFEE - LOVE YOUR ENEMY

The whole loving an enemy thing is some hard stuff, isn’t it? . Bible, Quran, Torah, Buddhist teachings, your neighbor on a daily Humanist basis, atheists looking clear-eyed at peace - all these people’s texts and sensibilities at some point address loving a neighbor, and seriously, what is an   more»

THINGS I KNOW THAT MAYBE HELP YOU TOO

~ Here’s how to know which one is the more betterer one between LDL and HDL. HDL = Happy Damn Lipids. LDL = Lousy Damn Lipids ~ Stalactites and stalagmites. Stalactites have to hold on “tite” to the ceiling. Stalagmites are the other ones. ~   more»

WATCH THE LANGUAGE

I’ve grown old and anecdotal. One thing earns the other. I’ll apologize for nothing. So this story. Steve, I recall you in college as the nicest guy. You were tops amongst a bunch of athletes at Connecticut College that were both jockey and brainy.   more»

Peace

Dear Jay, You were torment as a neighbor. When you lived here you admitted being diagnosed OCD, yet you mowed our lawn, publicly criticized our clothesline, sent certified letters about trash cans (gardening cans. . . ) out early/late. You dumped and spread dirt on our lawn.   more»

A Few Wonderful Things

Hi Vance Friends & Fans- WHAT: Vance Gilbert’s Monday Night Acoustic Pajama Party #5 - Motown, R&B, Soul On Acoustic Nite WHEN: Monday, 4/13, 7:30 pmEDT WHERE: https://youtu. be/5bP_Th2c6QQ Yeah, I got a lot of requests for this one. Heaven Help Me it’ll be me (how dare I   more»

AMERICA’S BEST VALUE INN, MANCHESTER, CT

So Ellen, my crackerjack administrative manager, is always looking for decent cheap hotels for me. See, as I have gotten older, that 3+ hour drive home from NYC and it’s environs at 11pm is a thing no more. And if I’m going from Connecticut or NY to points   more»

Book Of Silhouettes

I was at Chinese buffet with my brother and his partner, and we had pretty much put a hurting on the place in our first round of plates. To the table to my right a man and a woman were just arriving. She sat down directly, however he   more»

New Album Time!

Hi VanceFans, Well it’s that time I told you would come. I’m looking for money. Thank You In Advance for your patronage. Those of you who have fund-raised with me before know how I work. It’s a no-nonsense, all-aboard deal. You give $1 dollar,   more»

Monday Brain Droppings

I’m home after a whirlwind 9 days including a red-eye with no sleep. And I wouldn’t for a nanosecond trade it. Here’s why, in terrifically loose order: First came The Iron Horse, while sporting an intimate less-than-80 people show, was a wonder for all of us, even if   more»

The Power Of Music

I hope this young lady doesn’t mind my putting this up. Names are changed to protect. It’s too lovely to keep to myself. If there’s any more indication that we touch other’s lives, this is certainly one near the top for me: "You don't really know me but   more»

A Wedding Story (of a different kind)

STORY: I played the best wedding ever this past weekend. Yes, Believe it or not, I play a lot of weddings. Fans get a hold of me, I charge fair but still kinda steep prices, and I play songs at the ceremony, a Vance Show for the   more»

BRAIN STUFF

I was told it was time to blog. Blame Amy Malkoff, my web manager. Hold none of this against anyone. I could change my mind on any of it by morning ———————— Some say Barack Obama was the most divisive President in our history. And I   more»

31 Favorite Important Performances

This is in no order, and each choice is driven by something in each performance, usually the vocal, with some exceptions, that over the last 50 years, has stopped me in my tracks. Speaking of tracks, yes, I know some stuff may have been overdubbed and might be the   more»

"Nearness Of You" officially available!

Vance Gilbert’s solo jazz standard album Nearness Of You took 2 mics, one guitar, and 35 years to make. The acoustic singer-songwriter scene stalwart finally got the courage up enough to sit down and record this album filled with the most venerated of tunes - tunes he has sprinkled throughout   more»

On Dogs, Homework and Earth, Wind & Fire

Yeah. It’s been a while. I think I’ll just jump in and start flailing. . . BARK Magazine - vs - Cesar Millan When we got our first Standard Poodle, Louise, rescued from the streets of Springfield MA back in 2003, she was aggressive to other dogs. We dropped   more»

Midterm Election Review

The demonization of this president is complete, the populous bought it, the next 2 years will be spent in legacy protection, we will have a Republican president in 2016, so it's time for us to hoist up panties and prepare for 2020. Lemme see if I can explain how   more»

The Great Annoyer

I think I’ve annoyed at least 3, maybe 4 or 5 famous people in the last 60 days. My apologies to: 1. ) Richard Foos - Millionaire Music impresario, once owned Rhino Records and now of Shout! Factory. I wrote you, you wrote me saying you’d get   more»

My summer so far, in one sentence...

After looking at the contract for The Voice I wrote a long nice goodbye letter to the exec casting folks saying that I'd be happy to work with them but the contract was unworkable, the truth being it was 55 pages of somewhere between sharecropperhood and slavery based on 2   more»

A Few Things I've Written

Here are a few Things I’ve Written Text From A Golf Resort The following is the response to some “have a happy day shid” my brother copied and pasted in a text to me: where roads reach up to greet you, there’s comfort on difficult days, and other garden placard   more»

Angry, Part Deux. Not So Much Anymore

Remember how I was angry about being railroaded by an axe grinding promoter/board member? I wrote the other promoter a note saying how joyous I’d be in playing there again, telling them that I understood that they were bandying my name about for the next season. They wrote   more»

Angry

Amy Malkoff, whom I trust implicitly in with all things web-internet based and all things backing vocal and arrangement (see "Leaving Avon" & "Lie To Me" on Unfamiliar Moon), was quite adamant during one of our first meetings around setting up my then new website and its accompanying "blog".   more»

BAD DOG BUFFET IS OFFICIALLY RELEASED...RIGHT NOW!!!

BAD DOG BUFFET IS OFFICIALLY RELEASED. . . RIGHT NOW! ! ! Order here. This is a Thank You. I belong to a fraternity of hobbyists called the Flying Aces Club. I don't go on and on about this group at shows, primarily because I   more»

VANCEFUNDER - Put your money where my mouth sings!

You know me. I'm Vance Gilbert, singer, songwriter, guitarist, and sometimes comedian.   Most of you have already heard me all over North America over the last 20 years. I opened Shawn Colvin's Fat City Tour in the '90's. 2006 thru 2008 I was the opener   more»

Wheelchair Tennis, Writing Checks, and Vet Stories

Kickstarter or the Like - Fan Funding My Next Album Before I get going on really ranting, I am announcing my pre-announcement for the announcement for my fan funding campaign. I’ll be asking for funding and giving away as premiums: time, music, lyric sheets, a guitar, decade-old glossies of me   more»

NOW *THIS* IS A RANT

Look, Falcon Ridge Folks Fest was magnificent, but I’m absolute toast, I’m still not rested up, and I’m just letting it fly. Hope no one’s feeling get hurt here. . . oh whatever. James “Whitey” Bulger If you are suspected of killing people and perpetrating all kinds of other crimes   more»

On the Boston Marathon, Doctors Without Borders, and Ellis Paul

Boston Marathon Bombing Amy Malkoff, my web manager, and a fine musician in her own right, suggested that it was probably time to update my blog/rant page. She sets no deadline, doesn’t beg, but just suggests that it’s time. Well, she didn’t have to ask but once this time.   more»

Jade Garden

Jade Garden It’s no secret. Anyone that knows me knows my love of Chinese food. And wings. So Chinese wings are The Second Coming, of course. Sorry, God, but I believe you’d understand if you were here. . . Alas, they are not the greatest   more»

Some 2012 into 2013 ANT's (Annoyed Negro Thoughts):

Thank You Note: Last summer I gave gifts and/or money to two recently married couples, one college graduate, and a girl/woman on her Bat Mitzvah. Now, I'm not rich, and it wasn't much money. I think each situation got 50 bucks - that's enough for a decent local Thai   more»

Observations, Eh?

Overall Recent Life Observations:-When your ENT looks in you nose with that black plastic thingy and says “Ewwww! ! Yuck, gross! ! ”, you can be sure you have a sinus infection. -See the recent advertisements for the iPad Mini? I though I already had one of those.   more»

Color and...

Color and the Parallel Bars ". . . will help recalibrate what young females of color believe is within their reach, while also influencing Western ideas and concepts of black womanhood, strength, agency and femininity—which has been historically objectified, sexualized and, it should be noted, feared. " The preceding quote is from   more»

Random Ranting

The Audacity of Teaching- Look, this isn’t an advertisement. Just part of what I do. For the last 3 years my Wednesdays have been all about students in the greater Boston area learning the folk thing from me. Most see me do my performance workshops at Falcon Ridge or   more»

Ranting, Raving, and Guitar Solos

McDonalds banana bread and scones And I’m going to Paulie, my car mechanic, for a colonoscopy. Lord, please. Carsie Blanton She’s the next thing, in my book. She’s opened for me a few times, and then some work with Paul Simon. . . A lyrical genius, magnificently sweet-voiced, a fine   more»

The Movies

I play guitar and sing. So, far be it from me to really be an arts critic of anything else other than what I already do. Even in this genre I often don’t  have much in the way of perspective. But I am a consumer with even   more»

Wings

Wings. I love me some wings. At least two types. The first type are those that are on airplanes. Particularly passenger airplanes from history. That said, just a few nights ago I was chatting with an elderly man who opened up to me about being a B-47   more»

New Years Musings

Happy New Year Everyone! Here's what I'm is (sorry, what I *be*) thinking about this day, with the requisite football in the background…. . ------------------- Dear Artist, Enough time has now passed that I no longer feel there is any danger of embarrassing or exposing you publicly. But I am calling   more»

Here's some thoughts from me this holiday season

~ Holiday Giving. . . Habitat For Humanity. . . I just give to them because I like what they do. I have friends who have worked for them and they are the real deal. I also occasionally give to Doctors Without Borders, however I was pretty aggravated   more»

November Bits & Pieces

From the "I'm Just Saying" Files: I just saw a commercial for an uber-violent World Of Warcraft video game where Chuck Norris not only stars in the game, but looks into the camera at commercial's end and says "I approve of this game". Isn't this the same outspokenly Christian, philanthropic guy,   more»

The United Event Aftermath

The ACLU tracked down the police report from the MA State Police. Note that this isn't an arrest, there's no warrant for me having fled to Poland, there is no police record, and I'm not on any no-fly list. It is, however, as I suspected - some passenger   more»

On presidential campaigns, candidates, elections, and yes, race.

I’ve been watching the Republican candidate for president race with a modicum of interest, as I don’t believe there’s a chance in Hades that the incumbent President will be re-elected. That said, I am not afraid to have my views of race challenged. Lemme connect these two issues for   more»

(whole grain) bits and pieces

Whole Grain Pringles just seems wrong to me. I don't buy Pringles for their whole grain-ness. Reminds me of a vegetarian restaurant I played at in the 80's where the chef kept trying to push a vegan barbecue pork chop on me. "It taste just like I pork   more»

resolution, race, and reality…

I’d like to thank everyone that Facebooked, Tweeted, contacted me thru my website, wrote me personally, wrote notes for me, called, stuffed notes in baggies through my door (Irene was raging and a neighbor wanted to make sure…) and just reached out to me in the last week. Your   more»

Racial Profiling First Hand

Racial Profiling First Hand. . . FWB&RAAB. . . You have to read through the letter below, sent to the ACLU, United/Continental Airlines, and/or a willing private lawyer (anybody? ) to get to the meaning of the acronym. What price Freedom, indeed. If the below is democracy and freedom,   more»

heartbroken

I'm heartbroken right now. Bill Morrissey. . . Nov 25th, 1951 - July 23, 2011. Simply the greatest storyteller I’ve ever known. An old friend and towering source of inspiration. His songs were like snapshots - little moments of time captured in lyric and melody, the sums   more»

Curiosities

One of my dogs barks back at the out chorus of Average White Band’s 1974 hit remake of the Isley Brother’s ‘Work To Do’, as there are guys singing “Work, Work…. . Work Work…” as the song closes. Roscoe feels the need to answer. Good boy! ! ******* Why   more»

Spring Rant

So, all the snow has melted to nothing, the government has avoided such, spring is finally looking like a reality, and two of these three things I can see out of my office window. I see that the branches and sticks trellis that my naturalist habitat gardener partner assembled   more»

Ok, so I made this video before Christmas in response to Cee Lo's "F**k You" that makes big use of a puppet. See above. Go ahead, watch it. I'll wait. Ok, you're back. . . Do you think that the idea for Cee Lo to have a   more»

DID YOU LOOK IT UP?

Yeah, I was driven to Wikipedia to look up Hosni Mubarak like many of you have done. Don't lie - you did too… Let's be for real, until an area of the map on your Map-Of-The-World shower curtain erupts in the news, most of us are woefully non-cognizant - ignorant even   more»

Welcome to my new site, and to rant #1!

Well, welcome to my new re-designed website. Thanks to Amy Malkoff, a fine singer in her own right, for her great moonlighting expertise in this venue. And welcome to the rant page. I think it's great that a pop song, well sung, craftily constructed, with a clear lyric,   more»

Vance takes on Cee Lo Green, as Bee Lo Blue, and new website coming!

Hi Everybody, If you're reading this, it's (hopefully) because you're a fan. I am confident you have at least an inkling of current pop culture, and that you've heard Cee Lo Green's smash hit "F**k You" (be aware, slightly explicit content): www. youtube. com/watch? v=pc0mxOXbWIU everywhere from pop radio to Ellen DeGeneres   more»

We will always need each other...

Hi Everybody, Up On Rockfield is out and available. I'm touring, teaching, writing, and as always, I'm doing what I can to get music out to you - live and otherwise. And we are in the midst of the hardest and most uncertain economic times since the Great   more»

____________________________________________________________________________________ Roscoe This is Roscoe. He is, like our lovely Louise was, a Standard Poodle. At this writing he is 15 weeks old, a riot, a handful, brilliant, and ours. It had been 3 months since we lost Louise and that love for a dog needed to go   more»

TRASH DAY BEFORE MEMORIAL DAY

This past Wednesday was uncharacteristically 90+ hot for late May. Wednesday is when the trash gets picked up, and I went for what was probably a too long run in the heat, surely missing 1/2 of my audiobook thinking of my Dad. On the Trash Day before Memorial   more»

PUT YOUR MONEY WHERE MY MOUTH SINGS

You know me. I'm Vance Gilbert, singer, songwriter, guitarist, and sometimes comedian.  Most of you have already heard me all over North America over the last 20 years. I opened Shawn Colvin's Fat City Tour in the '90's. 2006 thru 2008 I was the opener for   more»

UP ON ROCKFIELD……THE NEW ALBUM IS HERE!!....OFFICIAL RELEASE  SEPT 23, BUT YOU CAN GET IT HERE AND NOW!!!

6/16/08 Welcome to summer and the new album! ! UP ON ROCKFIELD is available now, and it is an assemblage of music beyond my wildest dreams! The concept of the tunes being written as if someone else was writing them is a real hit. I'll leave it   more»

C'mon Winter, You Don't Scare Me....

1/1/08 Yeah, it's the New Year. Clean slates, diets, the gym. . . . I'll remind you of all this in a few months! I'm just about done writing all the songs  as I work towards a new album called "Sounds Like. . . ". The concept goes like   more»

Roscoe

This is Roscoe. He is, like our lovely Louise was, a Standard Poodle. At this writing he is 15 weeks old, a riot, a handful, brilliant, and ours. It had been 3 months since we lost Louise and that love for a dog needed to go somewhere.   more»

Angels, Castles, Covers - The New Album/ Carlin Has Gilbert

Goodbye Louise 7/19/2006 Dear All, Louise went to sleep for the last time at 11:50 am today. I am so much a better person for her having been here for the last 3 years. Thanks to all of you for all of your support, prayers, and good thoughts.   more»

Vance Gilbert's new CD - Unfamilliar Moon

UNFAMILIAR MOON is Vance Gilbert's most mature and realized recording to date. This is his most anticipated album, as it is jam-packed with songs that fall into "that" category of songwriting- the zenith for any writer - songs that elicit the response "You wrote that? " Consider "Ten Thousand   more»