When: Monday nite 4/27: 730pm ET

Where:https://youtube.com/live/7qqHlJFpjvw?feature=share  

10% goes to: Massachusetts Association for Community Action https://www.masscap.org They can help with utilities for seniors and the poor amongst other stuff

http://paypal.me/vancevancevance or https://venmo.com/vancevancevance or VanceFunder P.O. Box 17, Arlington, MA 02476

*PRIVATE COACHING AVAILABLE - Songwriting, performance, and voice.

***CUSTOM SONGS - Expensive, sure, you want one about you, your family, something.

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OIL BOILER DATING SERVICE

Hi I’m Peerless. I was born in Boyertown PA around 1954. I’ve lived in this house since then. Sam and Elsa were my first “people”, then this couple acquired me when they bought the house in 2000.

My identifying personal nouns are It Sounds Like It’s Running/Big Green Box That Sorta Heats Shid

Look, I never claimed to be particularly handsome. But I can keep you warm at night. OK, the house is warm. There’s no such thing as a hot shower in this house. That’s thanks to my coils. They supply on-demand hot water for showers and other domestic water chores, but - to be frank and ironicalll - they’re self-insulated from heating anything because of the corrosion of time. I like to say my coils are “experienced”, thanks.

How does this “new” (hahahahaha laughing till crying emoji!) owner know all of this talk? Well, they’ve looked around and about and have come to some conclusions:

~ They don’t want to outright replace me brand new because that’s 15K to 20K. It’s not the money. It’s the money versus time (they have left) versus hot showers equation. They buy ripe bananas so they don’t need a 30 year warranty, trust me. But they smell bad.

~ And offshoot heater/heat exchanger just for shower? Sure!! Oh, wait they’ll need another 10K electrical work to bring in another 220V line from …oh wait they’ll need another whole electrical box (shocked face emoji)? Ca-CHING!! They still smell bad.

~ NO ONE wants to just replace the coil. NO ONE wants to battle rusted, broken-off bolts to get to it, the internal water damage, and NO ONE will guarantee that work. Highly unrecommended, even with the hundreds of Youtube videos showing just how to do such.

~ NO ONE sells used maybe 25-30 years old versions of me from someone else’s basement out of the zillion rebuilt houses in this neighborhood alone.

SEE MY NAME? THERE’S NO ONE LIKE ME… I WILL NOT BE IGNORED!! Ohhh I loved Glenn Close in that movie when I heard it from upstairs. DON’T MAKE ME BOIL - SOMETHING - IN A POT (maniacally laughing emoji).

Oh wait. You wanted hot water?

Call me.

(Pic of me and the new owner. Gosh, he smells…)